July 2006

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I often talk about how little energy I have these days.

I figure I wake up every day with about 100 energy units. And I figure my daily life of puttering around the house takes up about 50 units. This includes dealing with McCaffrey, walking up and down the basement stairs a few times, and eating two meals at home.

That leaves about 50 discretionary units every day. I’ll probably have to reassess and reissue these numbers but they should give you a sense of what I’m talking about.

5 energy units to walk up one flight of stairs.
15 units to compose an average blog entry.
15 units to take a shower.
15 units to rinse pile of dishes in the sink.
15 units to walk 100 feet.
20 units to come up with excuse #1453.*
20 units to do a load of laundry, including carrying the basket upstairs.
20 units to talk to someone in person for an hour.
25 units to go out to lunch.
30 units to talk to someone on the phone for an hour.
30 units to compose an above-average blog entry.
35 units to go out to lunch with someone (chatting while eating).
50 units to write half a page of my novel.

*In response to a Becca special request.

I was flipping channels the other night and I saw a poll question on Fox News asking the viewer to guess which house is safer for children — a house with a pool or a house with a gun.

I didn’t stick around long enough to see the results but I assume they thought they were using pools to show us how safe guns are. I don’t know whether guns or pools are more dangerous but I’m guessing the message was, “It’s safer for children to play in a house with a gun than it is for them to play in a house with a pool!”

But aren’t they really using guns to show us how unsafe pools are?  “You thought guns were unsafe!? Wait until you see the stats on pools!”

In any case, absent option three is probably the safest: the house with neither a pool nor a gun.

So Dick Cheney is mad at the New York Times for “treasonously” printing information about the Administration’s antics? I suppose Dick thinks we should just trust him and the rest of the gang. Let’s tally up what they’ve done with the public trust so far:

  1. Trumped up WMD evidence to justify going to war in Iraq.
  2. Ignored reconstruction experts and decided to treat Iraq Reconstruction like a Presidential transition, assuming it would all work out.
  3. Had the NSA conduct domestic eavesdropping without first gaining search warrants from the special secret court created for this purpose.
  4. Had the NSA turn away Department of Justice lawyers looking into the legality of those NSA actions, saying they did not have the requisite security clearance.
  5. Okayed the creation of a massive database listing all the phone numbers called by customers of various large telephone companies. This is reportedly the largest database ever created. What is keeping the NSA from keeping copies of all the emails Americans send or tapes of all the phone calls Americans make? The Administration’s belief that it would be an invasion of privacy? Or just the impossibility of such a large database?
  6. Decided torture was okay.
  7. Changed the FDA’s role from ensuring the safety of pharmaceuticals to applying the conservative agenda to the distribution of contraceptives.
  8. Redacted portions of a NASA report that supported the existence of global warming.
  9. Generally, took the science out of federal regulations.
  10. Thought Brownie was doing a great job.
  11. Bashed Democrats as traitors for proposing an Iraq withdrawal plan and then hours later had the military announce the very same plan.
  12. Raided a Congressional office in an Executive Branch power play.
  13. Announced they will ignore certain legislation even as W signs it into law (the so-called signing letters). Seriously! Can you believe these tools!?
  14. Demanded the line-item veto.
  15. Generally, bent the Rule of Law into the Rule of W (and Dick).

You’re doing a great job Dickie! What democractic institution do you plan on shivving in the back this week? This Administration realizes they have to leave office after the next election, right? They sure seem to be pushing an Imperial Presidency (and not a very smart one) down our throats.

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